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 I feel like a failure, and about to give up!

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Leeleebug
Newborn
Newborn
Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 4:47 pm

I was finally ready to start thinking about getting a husky about two years ago. I loved them as a kid and followed dog racing and the Iditarod, and learned everything I could, even at a young age of 10.
I am prone to be impulsive and do things without thought and preparation. So I made sure I was sure that a dog, and more specifically the breed of dog, was what I wanted. I researched for a whole year. I watched videos, I went to websites to learn about them, I went to forums and read, I visited breeder websites and read their input on the breed, I even visited a kennel a few times to visit their dogs. After a year, I still wanted one so we started to look for breeders. I found one, and decided to finally put a deposit down. It was estimated to be even still 8 months before he was conceived, born, and ready to go home. Time passed, and I still wanted him. So   knew I was making a solid and thought of decision.

The day came and we got him. I was fully prepared and determined. He was a sweet boy and had a very laid back and calm temperament. Every one that saw him him mentioned that he was very calm and relaxed for a husky. He potty trained easily too. Within a few days he had picked the concept up perfectly. He had accidents here and there, but by 3 months old he was solidly potty trained. He would sleep over night, uncrated, and hold it. If he really had to go in the night, he would come to the bed and nudge my arm. He would sit, lay down, fetch, listen when I said no, and walk his leash fine. I was awed at how easy he was. I had prepared myself to be a drill Sargent when we got him.

Out of nowhere he flipped. He chases the cats, barks, and purposely seeks out to annoy them or make them growl by agitating them by walking up close and staring or trying to climb where they are and then barking when he gets them to growl. He won't stop. I tell him no and he will just stare at me until I look away. When I get up to get him and out him in time out, he runs. I can't catch him. He hides under the table and it takes me awhile of the back and forth game to flush him then he runs to the couch and back to the table. I corner him eventually and out him in his crate. When I do catch him, I have his collar and he immediately starts GUIDING me to the crate. He knows that's where he is going. And by the time I catch him I am afraid he even forgot what he did wrong in the first place.
He started peeing on he couches. No reason at all. He still is taken out when he needs to be and still gets monitored water. I don't understand why the couch and not the floor. I noticed the cats are scratching the couch too and they haven't scratched since they were post trained when they were younger. Maybe it's territory war?
We run him and hike with him. We do not hit him.
He refuses to stop any sort of negative behavior no matter how many times we reinforce that it is wrong. Chewing on furniture, digging in trash, harassing cats, purposely flipping his metal bowls around on the floor while he stares at me. (Even after he just ate or drank) I will say no and give him a toy or something, and a few seconds later he walks right up to his bowls, flips it with his paw while he stares directly at me. I have to store his bowls on the counter to keep him from flipping it or flipping water everywhere.
He also, no matter how many raw hides, bones, toys, balls, kongs, etc we have given him he won't stop chewing. He isn't left unsupervised for long periods. But if I'm busy doing something and he isn't watched for 3 seconds he will start gnawing at anything. He ruined our brand new bedroom set that we splurged for. He chewed a little on every piece of the set. The corner of the bottom.
When we leave, he won't stay crated. We have been consistent since we got him. He knows to go in there when we leave. And he is hardly in long. The most is 4 hours that we had to leave. I am a stay at home wife. But every time we leave he howls the whole time our neighbors say. He stopped but only because he knows how to get out now. He can't be kept in. We even zip tied the walls of the crate together so he couldn't pop them down. He unlatches the door...or he somehow gets the bottom to slide out and he dug up our carpet!
Everything in our home is ruined. My husband is depressed constantly now, and we are fighting over him all of the time. We are going to have to spend thousands to replace all of the stuff he destroyed. He got out of his crate when I went to the grocery store yesterday and destroyed my prescription glasses and a few reading books off the book shelf. Oh, and peed on the couch in three places.
I want to keep trying but I don't even know what to do anymore. I am seriously considering rehiring him, but he is like this and I don't want him to be rehomed again because of the same reason. And I suspect another person won't care to keep him or try to train him for as long as I have.
Is this just him and who he is? I hiked him and ran/walked him 9 miles one day and he STILL had energy when we were done. And enough to be defiant. I can never unleash him to pee or poo even in our 20x20 gated dog area. He is uncatchable and will not come. He won't respond to coming any time either. Not even in the house. His treats are rotated every week or so because he gets bored with them and won't respond to anything. I have went from several different types of dog treats, to crackers, to sliced cheese, to whatever else. He won't budge. I am firm. I do not let him sleep with me. He eats after we eat. He is told no since day one not to jump or bite. The problem is not that he thinks he is pack leader, the problem is that he KNOWS that I am pack leader and he challenges me and has no fear of his punishment or consequences. He knows what he is doing is unacceptable. I don't know what to do, please help. I love him so much. He has such good days where he is perfect, and obedient and relaxed. I think it will all be fine. Then he goes right back to it a few days later. My dream dog is becoming my nightmare!
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Leeleebug
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Newborn
Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 4:53 pm

Oh, he also does spiteful things purposely, if I make him mad. If I leave the house to check the mail or get something out of the car, a total of two minutes. He gets mad if I don't take him. When I come back he either has peed or pooped somewhere. Or knocked the trash over any number of things.
If I tell him no sometimes or take something away, he will pee.
This is even if he just went out 20 minutes beforehand.
He isn't like this ALL of the time. He has less good days than bad ones though. Weeks of bad behavior with a week span of good. Then back to normal
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GingerDog
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GingerDog

Female Join date : 2013-02-03
Location : Colorado

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 5:14 pm

Try a plastic airline crate instead of a wire one, there is less to get a hold of and might be harder to get out.

How old is he now and is he neutered? Has anything in his environment changed around the time all this started?

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arooroomom
Husky Collector
arooroomom

Female Join date : 2009-12-13
Location : South Fl

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 5:15 pm

Wow! Sounds like someone is having a blast being a naughty Husky.

Few questions:
How old is he?
Is he neutered?
How consistent is his exercise? Daily? Weekly? Weekends? How long/far on average?
Have you tried airline crates instead of metal ones?
Has he always been used to you being home?

Huskies, as a general rule, do not do well off leash. They also very much enjoy these little games such as "chase" me into my crate, knocking things over for a reaction, dumpster diving... These are are things that are quite common with Huskies. Doesn't mean however that this is how it is.

I don't think he thinks he's the "leader" I think he knows how to push your buttons and get a rise out of you so he can play a fun game. How much mental stimulation goes on? Kongs? Hide and seek type games? Anything? For dogs who are so "naughty" they usually are very capable and willing to do things like mind puzzles or working at "fun" things like agility ect. ect. Teaching him to run through tunnels or jump over bars ect ect can be more fun for him than classic sit, stay, fetch type obedience. It's more of a challenge both physically and mentally.

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I feel like a failure, and about to give up! 6877191385_f831cf231c
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jbealer
Husky Stalker
jbealer

Female Join date : 2009-05-29
Location : Denver, CO

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 5:20 pm

How old is he now? sounds like your in the teenager stage and sadly this is when our rescue ends up with most huskies because people cant handle this. also has he been neutered?  have you met any other husky owners for play dates? do you walk him at least 30 min 2xs a day every day, or go to a dog park?


Edit: looks like we all posted the same questions at the same time

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I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Iaht10
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Leeleebug
Newborn
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Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 9:54 pm

Hello guys, I am back.
He is intact, and five months old. We try to take him hiking every day, but usually ends up 4 days a week and it's usually for about 1.5-2 hours and some days 4-5 hours. Sometimes we just walk him in the event for 30 mins if it's a busy day. He has a kong. He gets bored with his toys easily. I try to give him interesting things. Like an old sock tied with two tennis balls in it. Or his favorite, is a empty 20oz water or sad bottle. Whatever is loud and noisy he likes. I also chase him thought the house sometimes and play chase. Or pull on his ropes with him. I cant do it all of the time though I have stuff to do a lot of times and I will be in school again soon. He has always been used to me home. I am worried it will get worse when I am gone to school in January and busy with homework. We have a few husky owners in our apartment but they are not active with their dogs I believe....
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Leeleebug
Newborn
Newborn
Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 9:56 pm

I was thinking about joining a husky meet up. Maybe finding some advice from veteran owners and watching them with their dogs. Or having Apollo see other dog behavior and follow their example.

Also, I agree with your shelter comment. People get huskies because they are attractive and neat looking. The husky is sadly a fad dog in San Diego as of right now. Everyone wants one, and for the wrong reasons. It's like they are the next new popular fashion statement.
So many people see ours and tell me they are getting one for their young children or that they want one. I don't discourage them but I do tell them it's not a great dog for a child, and most families. It's more work than having a child, and I don't think he is ever going to be fully obedient. It is who he is. And I think people get father without realizing or believing what they hear about them, and they can't do it, or they don't want to. I have sat down and cried sometimes because he frustrates me so much. I know it sounds sad but he just frustrates me sometimes so couch in  me day, I feel like I am not up for this and I might be better off letting someone better take care of him.
I see huskies all over craiglsit, and in the paper, for sale..they are 4-6 months old and they always have the excuse that they are moving and can't have their dog in their new apartment. I know they are fibbing. They all say the same thing exactly. And they show no concern or requirements for prospective owners.  If I had to move, I would make sure to find a home my animals could be in.. So I know they are fibbing.
I do not want to be one of these craigslist husky posters. I want to be a happy husky owner that has a dog that is obedient and fits with the family. I am fighting for my puppy, but it's also causing me to fight with my husband.


Last edited by Leeleebug on Fri Nov 29, 2013 10:07 pm; edited 1 time in total
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techigirl78
Adult
Adult
techigirl78

Female Join date : 2013-06-26
Location : Wisconsin

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 10:06 pm

Do not feel like a failure. My lexi loved wood as a puppy and also ate our bedroom set in addition to all my tables and even my stairs. These are reasons why some avoid puppies. I know when loki was young even general puppy school helped just to hear how all the puppies had issues of some sort.
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Leeleebug
Newborn
Newborn
Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 10:10 pm

Yes I am hoping it is the hard puppy stage and he will get calmer. Will nuetering help? And if it does, what does it help?
Our cats, Loki and Odin, (I have a Loki too!) were horrible as kittens and up to about a year. We had things destroyed too, wires, curtains, the couch they scratched on, knocking things over, destroying blinds....but it passed and they are great cats now. So I keep thinking Apollo is going to settle too and become more mindful of me?
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seattlesibe
Senior
Senior
seattlesibe

Male Join date : 2013-02-05
Location : seattle, wa

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 10:12 pm

In terms of his energetic rowdyness in the house, I wonder if maybe you're playing with him too rough and rowdy when he's too young, and so that's the precedent he has for what's expected of him inside.

Does he have any quiet time that is mandatory? Are you able to hang out with him and just require him to be calm? Does he know off, or leave it, or any other calming commands?

It sounds like you have him on Go Go Go quite a bit and so perhaps he isn't calming down because, well, why should he if he's being engaged and encouraged to be rowdy so much all the time.

It sounds like you need to teach him to be more versatile in his play time and his way of just hanging out.

Seems like he gets a lot of exercise, perhaps even too much for his age. So that isn't an issue.

It's just getting these dogs at this age to understand the expectation of calmness is an extraordinarily huge task and it starts with setting the right precedent. It can be done, but of is a lot of work. Better to start now before school comes around again and then he's alone more....with all this energy. That's when it'll really get messy.

Good luck.
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Leeleebug
Newborn
Newborn
Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 10:40 pm

Well we don't rough play him at all. He isn't allowed to jump on me or bite or anything. I don't like it when other people come over and let him play like that either, and I try to tell them he isn't supposed to but they never stop him. They let him hand gnaw or climb on them.
I may get him too excited though, sometimes when we do a house lap. Lol but other than that, my play time and trick time with him his not in abundance. A lot of times I like it better when he simply follows me through the house or lays at my feet with a toy while I am doing chores or cooking. But some days even with attention,meh just goes crazy like I described. It's not all day, it's scattered and random short spurts and small instances. Behaviors that we thought went away or we thought he knew was unacceptable. He knows what not to do, and what is acceptable. He just gets in moods or regresses. Then stops and is good. When I think i am sure it won't happen again because it has been a week or more, he starts again. Especially with the peeing on the couch. He even climbed on the couch and over on top of the corner side coffee table and pooped on it. He has not pooped on the couches in a while but he was doing that too for a month.
I have used so much baking soda, vinegar, and bought products, to get the couches cleaned and have done it every morning for almost a month. Then he waits a few days and does it again. Cleaning the couch is a daily morning chore for me. We don't want to get a new couch and have it destroyed. So we are hoping it is over soon.

He is supposed to be down and calm in the evenings, after dinner and we want to watch tv. He usually will lay by my feet or in the corner for a little but he gets up randomly and wants to bother the cats or be disobedient on purpose. I don't understand. He does the couch peeing whenever I am not in the living room, but elsewhere either sleeping or busy. I hate to do it, but I am going to have to try and put him in his crate tonight. I don't think it's going to go well. He will yap after a while and my husband can't sleep through it. He is in the navy and gets up at 2am and gets home at 6pm. So that's why I haven't put him in it in the first place at night. I would just keep him out.
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Leeleebug
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Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 10:44 pm

Sorry for the long posts, but I feel like the more detail I provide, the better of a picture you can get on what exactly is wrong. The only thing I see with most of the trouble so far is maybe the cat rivalry. Marking the couch. And the constant picking at them or pushing them into the bedroom or on top of things because he doesn't want them walking around. And just trying to get them growling or running for entertainment so he can bark and run.

He also does have a word that we use and it is simply "No". He knows what it means and reacts only when I am looking cat him. As soon as I turn away it's right back to what he was doing.

It seems my basic problem is that he sees no consequence harsh enough that is keeping him from disobeying. Even after a long time in his crate he still doesn't care. Any other punishment methods that are successful? He gets treats as well often when he does good things. I always reward him if he decides to listen.
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seattlesibe
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seattlesibe

Male Join date : 2013-02-05
Location : seattle, wa

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 10:54 pm

Fair enough. Well hopefully some cat owners can chime in. I know there are threads on the topic.

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AMB
Senior
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AMB

Male Join date : 2009-07-23
Location : Connecticut

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 11:25 pm

Have you tried doing any obedience classes? Sometimes mental stimulation is stronger than physical activity, not to mention that he would learn a few tricks in the process. Also I agree that you should get him a stronger crate that he hopefully wont be able to break out of. That way whenever you leave the house, even for a minute, you can have him in there knowing that he wont be able to destroy anything. Crating him would also be beneficial for when you simply can't watch him (i.e during showers or meals.) Additionally I am in support of your decision to have him in his crate at night. If he's destroying things while you sleep then it is probably for the best. Another idea would be to have his lead on inside the house, that way you could pick it up and catch him easier. You could also use it to tie him to something that he can't pull (a table, a post, even yourself) to restrict his freedom, under supervision of course. Basically I wouldn't let him on your sofa or out of your site unconfined until you can trust him not to pee, poop, or destroy things inside anymore. It's a lot of work but it will also keep damage and "accidents" to a minimum. I also wouldn't recommend neutering him before 6 months old either as there are some health risks linked to having it done at such a young age.

Some people have had great success with shock collars, including some of our own members. Although I have to stress that it must be done the right way, if done incorrectly then it becomes a form of torture and he is still really young. But it might be something to look into...

As a disclaimer I don't really speak from experience on most of these things, but the above suggestions are the results of the research I've done and I hope it will be able to help you in some way. I know you can do it, when there's a will there's a way. Good luck! Very Happy
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GingerDog
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GingerDog

Female Join date : 2013-02-03
Location : Colorado

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptyFri Nov 29, 2013 11:33 pm

I have a defiant husky too, and we have managed to make it through- I believe in you! Neutering will help the "boy" behaviors- the peeing and possibly some of the defiance-like behavior.

So, as I believe someone said before, it sounds like he likes pushing your buttons. When he's bad you get upset and he gets attention. When he'd bad don't yell or chase him, but clap or shake a can of pennies (without looking at him or moving towards him), something like that to cut off the behavior without him getting "attention". It sounds bad, but I used to keep rolled up socks to throw at my girl (in her direction, not necessarily AT her). When he stops the behavior, then go to him and engage him in something more constructive.

Try to do regular indoor calm play times (training), even if its just a few minutes at a time. Teach him a new trick or two!

I'd maybe keep the chase, tug and rowdier games outside (at least for now). When you play chase, take breaks. Sit down and let him come to you- don't call him over and over, one time and then wait. If you aren't chasing him, he'll most likely get bored in a few minutes. When he comes, give him a cookie, praise him and restart the game. This way he'll learn that the fun doesn't always stop when you catch him.

Now the cats- my dog still chases the cats... Luckily, Murphy doesn't hurt them. I still tell her to stop, but I haven't figured out how to get her to quit it altogether. My kitties are pretty good at defending themselves or getting out of the way.
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SaraB
Rescue Subject Moderator
SaraB

Female Join date : 2010-09-09
Location : Deltona, FL

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 12:32 am

A few things that might help:

-Getting an airline crate (like was suggested before) or stronger crate that he can't break out of
-Keeping a long leash on him that he drags around when he's loose in the house (and when you get a crate he can't escape from, only allow him to be loose when you are there to watch him. Never alone when he can get away with things). For times when he's being really naughty, keep him tethered to your waist. It's hard for a dog to misbehave and get away with it when they are attached to their owners.
-Possibly try a belly band assuming he won't immediately chew it off (it's not fun to pee inside when you end up peeing on yourself!)
-You didn't mention it, so sorry if you already do, but have daily training sessions. Training sessions help tire dogs mentally and you'd be surprised how much energy it takes out of them.
-Treat him at random times during the day when he's being good. It works surprisingly well. During dog classes, our trainer told us to randomly treat our dogs when they were quietly sitting or laying down next to us while the trainer was talking. Now my girls are very good about being quiet and sitting patiently while waiting for my next command at classes instead of sniffing around wanting to do something else.
-Find a good professional trainer in your area. They will be able to give you hands on advice and point out what you are doing right and wrong. It's very hard to give advice sight unseen, because it's hard to know exactly how your and your dog react to each other.
-Get him neutered. It's not a guarantee, but it can help a lot. I know of some dogs that act no different after getting neutered and others that completely stop their "bad boy" behaviors. I will never forget when my SIL got her 7yr old rescue dog neutered. He had a very bad problem with marking everything in sight and trying to hump other dogs and even my SIL! Neutered completely stopped all that behavior! I was amazed. I was sure being 7yrs old that those behaviors were ingrained into his personality.

Good luck! I think finding a better crate will help tremendously. And when you are gone, leave a tape recorder on to see how long he really is howling. A lot of times neighbors exaggerate how long a pet is being noisy. Sometimes they flat out lie about it! And leaving a kong filled with frozen peanut butter in it will help keep him busy in his crate at least for a little while.

_________________
-Sara

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Woowoosig
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barbianj
Puppy
Puppy
barbianj

Male Join date : 2013-09-28
Location : Wisconsin

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 12:39 am

For us, a good trainer has made all of the difference in the world. I don't believe that you can recreate that experience with research and reading on the internet. Actually, we learn more than the dog. After every class, he is excited and happy. He likes to learn and get praise for doing a good job.

A good example is the command that we were taught to get him to come to us no matter what. From what I had read about Husky's, I didn't think it would be a simple task, but the trainer reassured us that he's still just a dog. Sure enough, if I need him in front of me, right now, he will come and sit. It took one day to learn, and is reinforced daily. Now, I consider myself a reasonably intelligent person, but I would not have been able to do that without being taught by another person.
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Leeleebug
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Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 1:15 am

Thank you so much everyone for all of your very helpful answers!
I think getting a airline crate is an idea that is going to happen. We need one anyways for shipping overseas. Might as well get one now. I think it will help let him know that he cannot get away with everything, and he is defeated, in the aspect of freedom whenever he wants it.
I have always been mostly against shock collars, but I think this is the last resort. Especially since he isn't like most dog breeds, that find shame in displeasing their owner. He doesn't care if he pleases me. He doesn't even care if he is crated. So I need to step it up. Don't worry guys! I will learn the right techniques and apply them.
Neutering is also what I am going to do. There is no need for him to be intact anyways. I am not breeding him. If he doesn't have his man hood, he will probably have less of a reason to test me as well. Lol kinda similar to marriage. Jkjkjk
I think the mental stimulation is something also that I need to be elaborate with. And setting a time and schedule each day for it is a good idea. Make it routine. I teach him things, but not every day. I knew huskies had a tendency to need mental tasks but I didn't realize it was exhausting for them as well. Thinking about it that way makes sense. I know one day of going to class and studying drains me more than anything can.
So I think when he realizes that he has consequences that are undesired and uncomfortable, and I take his escape methods away, as well as his manhood, he will humble down. He will know he has no way to escape me and it will make him respect me.
The leash in the house is awesome too, and so is the loud noise to startle. I do it with my cats (I clap) and they take off. I don't know why I never did it with the dog. Also, *smacks forhead* I have been putting peanut butter in his kong at room temp and frustrated at the rate he finishes it. Haha never thought to freeze it. I feel silly!
Maybe all of this will save my dear peace of mind and my beautiful dream boy.

Maybe if he respects me more I can get him to respond when he potties. I feel so embarrassed when everyone sees me chasing my dog around a 10x15 pen trying to catch my dog while I am waving a piece of cheese. I get so angry with the comments of people that assume I am just not working with him and claim "all you need to do is be consistent!" And then they pet their golden retriever or German Shepard on the head. Nobody understands how difficult these dogs are. I tell them that they are stubborn, or that the breed can't be off leash they can't be trusted or won't come back, or they are so smart they literally walk through the house observing and trying to find something to mess with or destroy. They don't get that they actually "task and reward rationalize" ..which is amazing, but frustrating. So I can't really explain to people and I just don't anymore. They will never know until they own one. I knew this dog would be this way. I heard it all, read it all. I expected a difficult, stubborn, intelligent dog. But he is five times more than what I EVER could even imagine possible. I think that's what everyone else is doing too.
I think it's nothing I am doing wrong, I think that these dogs are so smart, they require a lot of trial and error. And I have had to learn his personality to figure out what might work. Thanks guys for your help. I will report back often and let you know how we are.
I swear I will type fewer books. Haha

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arooroomom
Husky Collector
arooroomom

Female Join date : 2009-12-13
Location : South Fl

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 1:24 am

I just skimmed, so sorry if I repeat anything but I really do not think at ALL his behavior warrants a shock collar. There are many many more humane methods of training which do not require shock. There are more and more studies coming out which essentially shut out the "shock collar movement." With consistency and a level head you can overcome his naughty habits. He is only 5 months old. Neutering is a good step, I suggest you do that as soon as you can.

If he doesn't want to come to you from outside in his pen, give him 30 seconds to come to you as you present the treat. If he runs around and does dumb Husky things, just give him the time and walk out once it's done. He will be dumbfounded that his "game" ended so abruptly and wasn't fun at all. Give him 5 minutes and try again. Just go in there call him once and present the lure if necessary. It may take a few times but I guarantee it will work if you hold out. Once he does come to you and you get the leash on... MAKE A PARTY. You're creating a new game.

I do also agree with making an effort to encourage down time. Crate rest him on a schedule so he can begin to understand that not all times during the day does he need to be involved in SOMETHING. He needs to learn to self soothe and relax.

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Leeleebug
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Newborn
Leeleebug

Female Join date : 2013-11-29
Location : San diego

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PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 2:11 am


I always believed that if a strong form of respect was established from the dog that they would WANT to obey. The same as a child would. Pain punishment in my theory doesn't create respect, but instead fear. So I didn't know if the shock collar was the same? And all dogs that I have ever owned have always been pleasers that naturally respect.so I was at a dead end. I thought since you guys suggested it, then it would be okay. I was ready to try anything to teach him. I am desperate. But I will second thought the shock collar I guess.
And I am laughing As I type this: He is the most ornery and limits testing creature I have ever known. I almost have a fascination with how complex his reasoning and processing ability is. Now if only I could find some way to make him want to use that for me, and not against me.
I always thought that if I was good to him then he would be good to me. Maybe I should stop griping at him so much and just love him. Maybe he will want to please me then. I have been so caught up with his behaviors lately that I think stressing about all of it and showing discontent with him might be making him worse. I am showing him so much negative attention, maybe he is doing the same to me. I am sure my husband's new negative disposition towards him is sensed. I am going to try nothing but positive behavior tomorrow. Be silent and not react when he antagonizes me, but silently place him in time out. Then praise him over the top like you suggested, whenever he does good for me. I will work with him and make him perform for them several times throughout the day. We need to reestablish a positive mood to have a positive relationship.
Does this sound like it is plausible?
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Eresh
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Eresh

Female Join date : 2012-10-06
Location : Space Coast, Florida

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PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 10:08 am

Luci was a holy terror at that age. I don't know if it was teething or what, but there were many days that I just wanted to give it up. Nothing seemed to get through to her, and she couldn't care less if I was pleased with her or not.... no perk up at praise, no tail wag, nothing except 'gimme a treat, human' (complete with jumping and biting, which negated using treats to reward good behavior.. lol). That was the hardest part for me to get used to with having a husky, that 'I don't give a fig what *you* want' attitude. Now she is in the midst of teenager (13 months) and still doesn't care if I am pleased or not, but somehow it doesn't seem as bad. I think her puppy shenanigans was a form of husky hazing or something.
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arooroomom
Husky Collector
arooroomom

Female Join date : 2009-12-13
Location : South Fl

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PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 10:20 am

@Leeleebug wrote:

I always believed that if a strong form of respect was established from the dog  that they would WANT to obey.
This is not at all how Huskies function, especially not young rambunctious puppies. Lol!

Willfull disobedience was bred into them to make them have that nice independent streak we love so much. They can make thei own decisions. Sometimes it is not in our favor but it is something I marvel everyday. My Aussies would never dream to not listen, regardless of the among of anger or annoyance in my voice- the Huskies? They know when to keep their distance lol!!

It IS something to take int account. Some people don't think it's appropriate but it is part of this breed and I love them for it. Set rules and boundaries and don't I e int their games but you have to remember that this IS what makes them unique.

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SiberianAnubis
Adult
Adult
SiberianAnubis

Male Join date : 2010-11-09
Location : Stuttgart, Germany

I feel like a failure, and about to give up! Empty
PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 10:24 am

AS mentioned above you should contact a real dog trainer soon..
From what you wrote, Although he is only 5 months old, it can be the beginning of the teenager stage. But besides of that it seems that your dog already thinks he is the boss. You need to be ultra consequent now and set tighter limits.
Although you won´t believ eit when you go through that stage, the teenager time will end and putting alot of work, energy and effort into your dog now will pay out because it defines what kind of dog you will have after the rowdy time.
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capellalayla
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capellalayla

Female Join date : 2013-09-24
Location : Billerica, Mass.

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PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 11:18 am

I agree with Aidan's advice about tethering him to you, at least at those times when you think he's going to act up the most. If you know the signs that he's about to do something naughty, put his leash around your waist and hook him to it so that he goes wherever you go and you can keep a close eye on him. This way he's less apt to pee and poop on and eat your stuff, as well as chase the cats around. You can do this until he calms down a little.

To keep his mind active maybe try feeding him some of his meals in a food-dispensing toy like a Kong Wobbler. You can get more than one kind and vary it at meals so he never knows what to expect and so is less likely to get bored.

I also agree with Kristina that you need to change the way the game of chase is played. Her advice in this regard is spot on. If you make it no longer fun for him, he won't want to play chase.

Of course, none of this may totally fix the problem but it may help lessen it. He is an intact "teenager," after all. Smile

Hope this helps!
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Super Nova
Teenager
Teenager
Super Nova

Male Join date : 2013-01-18
Location : Northern Virginia

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PostSubject: Re: I feel like a failure, and about to give up!   I feel like a failure, and about to give up! EmptySat Nov 30, 2013 12:00 pm

As mentioned before there are a few things I personally would change in our routine.
1) Training. Either seek a good trainer or search for more training techniques online. It honestly sounds like he is bored. Huskies are insanely smart you have to keep them interested at all times. What does he know now? Whatever is it you need to triple-it. Make him learn right paw - left paw, sit, stand, down, up, under/over, extended down, extended stay, etc. But most important COME! You can't be chasing your dog = dog is in control.  Whenever our Nova is acting up we increase his training.

1B) Training Time. Routine vs. no routine. You should always be training your dog, at all times. When he is following you around the house. Sit, stay, come, paw, down, stay, come.. repeat. Always.

2) Crate. Once they figure out how to break out its time for a new one. We use an Airline crate - petsmart/petco have random sales for them.

3) Does he have separation anxiety?

4) Neutering. Will it help... maybe. Neutering doesn't guarantee anything.

5) Wear his butt out! We take our guy to a field once a week hook him up to a 100ft lead and let him run. Once he gets his zooms out do some training. Then make him run/play/jump. Bring a gallon of water with you and make run some more. Don't leave until he lays down and is done running/playing. We bought a varsity ball it's awesome. http://www.varsitypetsonline.com/products/Varsity-Ball

6) Be calm. I know it's hard - our male went through a really bad patch when he was about 8 months. You have to treat him like he's a new puppy and do everything from square one.
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